Petition To My Body

Ink and QuillWe, the undersigned, the resident of this diminutive, yet feisty, amalgamation of DNA from my mother and father and that mud pie eaten at the age of two, draw the attention of my body in which the resident is currently housed, to the following:

  • That the lack of cooperation and ensuing war between the immune system and the pancreas of the body has caused irreparable damage and unending bloodshed to said body due to the annihilation of beta cells.
  • That the failure to play nicely with all systems (nervous, circulatory, endocrine, reproductive) has resulted in the loss of brain cells and lacrimal fluid by the petitioner.
  • That despite all valiant efforts, the petitioner can still not eat pizza or bagels without cursing the body.
  • That even with the latest medical technology, the body still refuses to comply with the whispered pleas of: “Please, just have a normal blood sugar day for once.”

Therefore, the petitioner calls upon my body to:

  • Stop being a jerk and start doing what I tell you.
  • Digest food properly and in a timely manner.
  • Grow another 7 inches in height.

(I will take two out of three.)



And the entire time I wrote this, this was what I was singing.

Damn, I love Schoolhouse Rock.

This is part of Diabetes Blog Week. Here’s today’s prompt:

Diabetes Blog Week ButtonRecently various petitions have been circulating the Diabetes Online Community, so today let’s pretend to write our own. Tell us who you would write the petition to – a person, an organization, even an object (animate or inanimate) – get creative!! What are you trying to change and what have you experienced that makes you want this change?

Want to see more of today’s petitions? Click here for the full monty. 

  1. Haha. This was a terrific petition and one I would most definitely sign.

    1. I second that! Here Here!

  2. Gotta love Schoolhouse Rock!! It’s how I passed more classes that I would openly admit to to my teachers.

  3. Well, I don’t think you’ll get too many signatures on the petition claiming to be a resident of your diminutive, yet feisty body (your words, not mine), but when a decisionmaker finds that 100% of her constituents favor a certain course of action, it’s kind of hard for her to say no.

    With that said, I hope you get what it is you are petitioning for.

  4. I totally had to look up “lacrimal fluid.”

  5. […] to my diabetes body: Christel of theperfectd writes with such creativity. her posts usually make me really laugh and because of that, i have […]

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